I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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