Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
