You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
