So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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