I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
