those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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