this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
