We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize