Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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