It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'm having to shit out rocks
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