You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize