Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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