I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
