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the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
We have started to decorate penises.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
