She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
