I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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