Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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