i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize