dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
