I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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