I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
