so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize