Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
