I'm eating all of the evidence.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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