There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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