Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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