2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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