I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Rumble strips road head = magical
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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