They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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