yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
