I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
