Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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