Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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