Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
