No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
