ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
