so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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