i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize