ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
