This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
