I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
