we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
