I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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