Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
