That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
