she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
