she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
