My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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