i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
