I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
