Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
